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Sunday, 31 March 2013

Game of Thrones Season 3 Liveblog! Episode One: Valar Dohaeris

Posted on 17:29 by Unknown
WOW!
Game of Thrones is back!

EFF YEAH!
DANCE!

...oh. Who put Jon Snow in charge of the music?

that was a bad idea.

holy crap!

What's going to happen at the Wall?
Or in King's Landing?
Will we finally meet the Reeds?
How will Brienne and Jaime get along?
I bet there'll be some battles too!

Hit the cut with us, and we'll talk it over.



8:30 - so... about this whole OMGTHEPREMIEREISHERE!!! deal. 
umm, we had this whole deal worked out with The Walking Dead and don't exactly want to miss it.
Sooo, we'll be starting this deal up and running at 10:00pm. It'll be awesome - trust us.

If you're interested in the interim, pop by our Walking Dead Season Finale Liveblog! C'mon Walkers, White Walkers, it's similar.

these ones are just like... magic or something, it's cool.

8:45 - some of you might be questioning our decision to pull double duties on the blog.
some of you are probably annoyed you'll have to wait an hour to read along with us (yeah, right.)
well, maybe we didn't think that through so well. maybe we're bad at strategy, like Robb Stark.

meta meta


soo, sorry about that.

8:55 - so we're bouncing over to our The Walking Dead liveblog, but try back here in an hour or so for all that awesome fighting over being a King with all them different houses. oooh, descriptive!

9:45 - make sure you round up your drinks, folks. Just 15 minutes 'til we're rocking the return of Game of Thrones liveblog.

10:04 - well, we've started in progress and Sam and his mates are fighting some white walkers. One guy's dead already and Sam just got his ass saved by Ghost.

Old Bear arrives with some fire to dispatch the Walker, and asks Sam if he sent the Ravens.

"Tarly, look at me. Did you send the Ravens?"

Sam shakes his head.

"That was your one job. You had only one job."

way to go, you jerk.



10:06 - Old Bear says they have to go warn people, or before Winter's done, "everyone you know will be dead."

BOOM! Opening credits.
Wow, they look so much cooler!

10:08 - we're back with Rattleshirt and the Wildlings at one badass set.
'Poor' Jon Snow is being led about by Ygritte.

He sees a giant for the first time.
They look believable, a credit to the show's effects team.

Ygritte laughs at him.

"Don't stare too long. They're shy. And if you stare too long they get angry."

She tells him stories about them pounding men like hammers pound nails as one hammers a mammoth tusk into the ground.

10:10 - Wow, Wildlings pelt Jon Snow with various stones and such for being a crow bastard.  Many of them are children, who Ygritte reminds Jon have no fathers to discipline them.  Seeing as they were killed by his Black Brothers and all.

He asks if he'll be free to go when he's free.

"Sure you will," Ygritte tells him. "and I'll be free to kill you.

These two are so cute.

They're going to meet Mance.

10:11 -

"I smell a crow" someone says.

Ygritte and Rattleshirt tell the bearded man about the whole killing Qhorin thing. That seems to bode well for him.

Actual Mance is in the background and catches wind of this.
Fake Mance tells stories about killing people.
Pretty buff.

"What's your name boy?

Jon tells him, then bows.
Calls him Your Grace, which earns a good laugh.

10:13 - Real Mance sends everybody off for some private time with Ned Stark's bastard.  Holy shit, that's Dick Koosman!

margot at the wedding is one of my favourite movies!

Also, we learn that Fake Mance is actually Tormund Giantsbane.  Wonder how yonder giant feels about that.
They wax poetic about women, freedom and being a traitor.

"Why do you want join us, Jon Snow?"

Mance gets in his face.

"I want to be free."

"No, what I think you want to be, is a hero. I'll ask you one last time. Why do you want to join us?"

Jon tells him about Craster's Keep, and leaving babies in the woods, and what takes babies in the woods.

"You're telling me you saw one of them?" Mance asks. And asks why this would make him desert the walls.

Jon reveals the Old Bear's complicity in this arrangement, and says he wants to "fight for the side that fights for the living." he asks if he's in the right place.

Mance tells him "I think we'll need to find you a new cloak."

10:16 - Boob alert. Drink!

So Bronn is with a sex worker, lamenting his lack of imagination, but is eventually interrupted by Podrick.

"I didn't hear that," he tells Pod.

Pod says Tyrion sent for him though.

"It's a matter of life and death."

10:17 - Poor Tyrion looks nowhere near as bad as he does in the books.

There's a rapping at the door.

"Who is it?"

"It's your sister. The Queen?"

10:17 - Tyrion's taken aback by her guards, and doesn't want to let her in.  She tells him that a wooden door wouldn't stop her from killing him if she wanted to do it.  He tells her to leave her guards outside, and she complies.

"I'm not afraid of you, little brother."

Tyrion hesistates but lets her in (while holding an axe, of course).

"Why are you here?"

"I wanted to see your face. They said you lost your nose."  She remarks on how it's not nearly so gruesome as all that, and seems mildly disappointed.  Gods (ha), their dynamic is so great!  I would love more scenes with - well, anything on this show.

10:18 - ha! now these two cuties share the funny story about how Tyrion almost died, and the dude that almost killed him was one of their men.

Cersei quips a short joke.

Tyrion tells her Pycelle made the same joke.

"Are you proud to be as clever as a man whose balls touch his own knees?"

10:19 - The chess game continues as the two discuss various aspects of their respective relationships with their father over the years.

Cersei's nervous about Tyrion going to talk to him.

10:21 - Bronn arrives to meet with Tyrion but is interrupted Cersei guards, one of which is Meryn Trant (yknow, the Sansa beater?) They almost have a wee little scuffle, but Cersei exits the room, interrupting that.  They make a pretty amusing tableau as she exits Tyrion's chambers in a swirl of amazing skirts.

Later now, Bronn and Tyrion have a little walk and talk wherein Bronn asks for more money.
How much more, Tyrion asks?

"Double."
"Double?"
"Double. I'm a knight now. Knights cost double."
Tyrion complains that he doesn't even know how much he's paying Bronn now, and Bronn wisely points out that this means he can clearly afford it.

10:22 - ooh, poor Davos is on a beach, all sunburnt and blistered, without his finger pouch.

10:23 - A boat paddles to the shore and asks who he is.

"I was in the battle. At Blackwater. I am a captain, and a knight."

"Ay, sir, and serving which king?"

"The one true king of Westoros," Davos says, shivering. "Stannis Baratheon."

Fortunately, these men agree.

10:24 - Aboard the ship, Davos catches up with Salladhor Saan.

Davos is pretty sad about losing his sons.

Stannis is still alive (of course), and sulking at Dragonstone. Davos was to go there, but Salladhor's not taking him.

See, he was promised riches and glory in exchange for his ships.
He held up his half.

10:25 - turns out Stannis is held at Dragonstone, not seeing anyone but Melissandre.
She apparently burns people alive for being "servants of darkness" and sings to them as they die. Cool, no?

"I'm thinking Dragonstone is a place for us to avoid," Salladhor claims (given that they are a pirate and a smuggler, respectively - both clearly servants of darkness).

Davos declares his intention to kill Melisandre.  Salladhor Saan has little patience for this plan.

"If you fail, they'll burn you. If they succeed, they'll burn you."

Davos is angered.

"You drank with me on my wedding day!"
"You drank with me on four of my wedding days!" Saan retorts.

Stannis asks if he's going to help.
Salladhor tells him that when Davos dies, he'll collect his bones in a tiny pouch for his widow to wear.

Nice.  That is cold, but fair.

10:27 - Hey, look everybody! Robb Stark!

He and is bannerman come upon Harrenhall, all slaughtered up.
Yuck.

10:28 - Catelyn and Robb survey the damage.

Catelyn sees someone she knows, which is naturally kinda sad.
Humorously enough, it'd be sadder if they knew how close Arya was.

"Find her a room that would serve as a cell," Robb says.

Oh, good? He's locking up Catelyn for letting Jaime go?
I VASTLY preferred the way they did this in the books.  Talisa looks like she wants to point out that their marriage did kinda betray a major alliance, so, you know, hypocrisy...
but she's distracted by a sudden moan.

10:29 - Oh, some dude's alive.
It's Maester Qyburn. He's probably important, no?  I mean...fuck!



10:30 - so, it's time for Tyrion and Tywin's meeting.

"The badge looks good on you, almost as good as it looked on me."

Tywin is characteristically disinterested in Tyrion's company. Nice.  This fucking guy.
Then he complains about 'whores' of course.

"I sent you here to advise the king. I gave you real power and authority. You chose to spend your days, as you always have with harlots and drinking with thieves."

Tywin asks what Tyrion wants.

Tyrion claims he just wants a visit, then goes on to say that he organized the defense of this city, as joffrey "quivered in fear behind the walls."  That he led the battle, and bled in the dirt for his family.

"What do I want? A little bloody gratitude would be a start."

Tywin's still not impressed.

"Tell me what you want."

"I want what is mine, by right..."

He wants Casterly Rock, which Jaime can't have because he took up the Red Cloak.

"You want Casterly Rock?"

"It is mine, by right."

"We will find you accommodations more suited to your name..."

Ha!

Tywin goes on.

..."and if you serve dutifully you will be rewarded a suitable wife. I will be eaten by maggots before I allow your name to sully Casterly Rock."

Tywin goes on to rip into Tywin for killing his mom (in child birth - who impregnated her, asshole? not that he didn't try to shirk that one, the dickface) and 'waddling about' under the sigil that Tywin's father and Grandfather wore. Then he tells him to go.

Fuck.
Poor Tyrion. These guys got some issues.

10:35 - Sansa and Shae play a game at the docks, making up stories about where ships are going.  Well, Sansa plays - Shae is bored, and her stories are too true.

"The truth is either boring or horrible."

Sansa is getting pretty jaded.  Can't really argue with her though.

Oh, great - Littlefinger is here!
He of no-voice-modulation.

Sansa is super tall now.

Baelish tells Sansa he's seen Catelyn recently. And - bombshell! - Arya!
Sansa reacts to this in a way that makes me ache to wish Arya could see it.

Littlefinger ells some lies, and implies he can get her out of there.

10:37 - Ros meets up with Shae and they have a discussion about how well they've each done "given where we've started."  She also mentions having been from the North, and recalling the day of Sansa's birth.

"It's not easy, for girls like us, to dig our way out. watch out for her,"

"I always do," Shae says.  She's watchful of Ros, and doesn't admit to anything (because she is smart, and probably assumes quite sensibly that Ros is a spy)

"Watch out for her with him," Ros says.

DANGER!
I'm very impressed with Ros' bravery for saying that, however!  And her compassion to the daughter of the man who held the lands in which she used to live.  What an awkward sentence that was.

10:38 - RAWR!

Dragon time.

Well, the CG is starting to look a little more believable as some medium sized Dragons fly about a boat, flying, fishing, cooking and eating.

They have some cool wing textures and spines.  The animation is much improved.

Jorah notes they're growing fast.
Dany thinks they're not growing fast enough.

"I need an army." she says.

Luckily, they're on the way to meet the Unsullied.

She and Jorah have a half-ass passive-aggressive argument as a bunch of Dothraki puke on the decks below. Cute touch, and more likeable than the books.

10:40 - Time for Dragonstone.

Is Davos there to fight Melisandre yet?

HA!

So, Stannis is seated, looking really pouty as Davos shows up to talk to him.

"well sir, you hired her."

"I had heard you were dead," Stannis tells him.

"Not yet. I had hoped to speak to you alone."

Stannis tells him they are alone, even though Melisandre stands right in front of him.

Davos doesn't like this whole 'burning people alive' thing.

Melisandre wants him to chill.



"I wasn't there when the wildfire killed our men by the thousands," she says.  She declares that she could have saved everyone.
She goes on to explain that they'd own King's Landing by now... but she wasn't there because Davos convinced Stannis to leave her behind.

10:43 - Melisandre goes on to intimidate and insult Davos for the loss of all those men and his son. Tells Davos to take comfort in what she told his son: "fire is the purest from of death."

Davos freaks out, duh.  I mean, she did a pretty great job of baiting him.  He is summarily carted off to the dungeons, as he pleads with Stannis, who continues to be somehow less sympathetic than in the books.

10:43 - Back at King's Landing, Joffrey is being carted about in his little King's carriage with a nice perfumed rag.  His litter/palanquin/whatever is followed by a golden one for Margaery.

Shit. His envoy has stopped.

It seems as though Lady Margaery is out to meet her adoring public.
She walks about through the filth, to... I don't know, meet people?
Talk to children about how their parents died?

She tells the kids that their dads stopped "bad men" from doing "bad things" and gives them toys.
Knight toys.

The kid says her dad wasn't a knight, just a soldier.
Mag says to be proud anyway, 'cause "under king Joffrey's leadership" their fathers saved the city. They did good, and upheld the realm - that's what knights do.  Oh, she is good.
She tells their carekeeper to come to her for whatever she needs to feed, house or clothe them.

"Directly to me."

Joffrey watches this from within his litter, with mounting emotions that remain to be seen.  Wouldn't it be great if he somehow exploded?

10:46 - Joffrey's inside, macking on Margaery now, and calling court meetings treason.  He is pretty terrible at flirting, but manages to compliment her gown.  Cersei agrees, adding a little dose of slut-shaming that Margaery plays off admirably.

Cersei insinuates that poor Mag is cold.
Joffrey offers to have someone fetch her a shawl.

"Us Tyrells have warm blood, don't we Loras?"

Marg goes on to try to compliment the Queen's dress and being.  Such exquisite metalwork!  HAHA!
Cersei ain't having none though.  She remarks that Margaery may well find armour useful once she becomes queen.  Or sooner.
She mentions that Joffrey told her about their excursion to Fleabottom, and Margaery's choice of walking amongst the public.  She recounts the attack they experienced (perhaps last season), saying that Joffrey nearly lost his life.

Joffrey says she's old and senile though. Nice.  I'm trying to flirt with my future queen, MOM!

"You're right of course," she says, acting up a fucking storm. "We can't all have a king's bravery.  You are your father's son."

The Tyrells exchange glances.
Actually, at this point they take a pause for everyone in the room to exchange glances.  I'm kind of drunk, and find this HILARIOUS.

10:48 - so, Margaery says up in Highgarden they've got a bunch of food and are willing to share.  Which of course they are happy to do, because their duty is to serve the realm - oh man!  How neatly she avoids mentioning the seige Highgarden had placed on King's Landing in season one!
Joffrey has a boner.
Cersei is pissed.

10:49 - Dany's run ashore in Astapor, and is talking to a man in an unsubtitled language (why?) to meet the Unsullied.

is anyone else giggling because their shields look like boobs?  
...anyone?
(link)

Dany receives information about the obedience and strength of the unsulled.
She asks to know of their training, and now  we get subtitles.

From Missandei...who is NOT eleven, but an adult woman with parts of her breasts exposed.  Thanks, HBO!

(link)


10:50 - We learn their training starts at five with weapons.  one that i missed, along with "the three spears."
i want to know what they are!
Apparently only 1 in 4 survives this training.

They fear nothing and shit. They're badass.

The subtitle says to tell Jorah he smells like piss. I like.

Now no more subtitles again.  Not enjoying this decision.

Then the subtitles return to call Dany a 'whore of Westeros.'

The dude goes on to spew some sexist-ass rhetoric and cut off a dude's nipple,
while we learn they've been castrated as well.  and this somehow makes them...what, exactly?

"This one is pleased to have served you." the harmed one says.  a great quotation, and a nod to the fact that the Unsullied are not given names, in an effort to strip them of their individuality.  Which they really could have mentioned, but hey, maybe it was in one of the unsubtitled bits.

Interesting, they've cut out the part about the dogs and left in going and killing infants in the market in front of their mothers then offering change for the trouble. I liked it better when they killed puppies they had since birth.
Dany is disgusted that they kill children in front of their mothers and offer them only a silver coin in response, and she is laughingly corrected - the coin goes to the baby's owner, not to the mother.

Dany eventually wants to know how many Unsullied they have to sell.

It's 8000 apparently.

I like this outside setting.

Dany's upset about 8000 dead babies.

Jorah's upset about them not being men now.
Dany gets to go to the coolest locales.  All rife with slave-trading and beachfront accomodations.

10:53 -  small blonde child gathers their attention in the market as a black cloaked figure follows behind them.  Gee, she sure looks innocent!  Oh, Dany.

the small girl rolls a ball to Dany and beckons she open it.

The cloaked figure stops her, then stabs the shit out of the scorpion dude thing that emerged from the ball. I looooved that thing in the book - it translated pretty well here!  Again, a hat tip to the effects team.

I think that girl was a Sorrowful Man. hmm.  Although she didn't apologize...and she definitely had blue lips, a la Pyat Pree.

Blackcloak dude... Artsan Whitebeard? Barristan Selmy?
Chases her off.

Shit, it is Selmy! (haha, i forgot that since we're in a visual medium and have, you know, seen this guy already, his identity can't be kept a secret)

WHOO!

SELMY!

"I've been searching for you, Daenerys Stormborn. I had sworn to protect your family, and I failed them."

Selmy asks Dany to join her King's guard as we roll out to the end.  I hope she starts using the word Queensguard soon, it always gave me a little thrill to read!

Holy Shit that was a good opener.
So well paced. So well constructed, and as usual beautifully shot.
So glad it's back!


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Posted in 2013, 31-March-13, adaptation, game of thrones, game of thrones season three, gender, gore, live blog, liveblog, rape, recap, season finale, sex, sort-of-a-movie, spoilers, valar dohaeris, violence | No comments

The Walking Dead Season 3 Liveblog! Episode 16: "Welcome to the Tombs" (Season Finale!)

Posted on 17:00 by Unknown
Whoo!

We made it through 16 episodes of guts and gore (and I don't mean the writing) to arrive at the climax of the third season of The Walking Dead.

One would get the impression there's going to be a showdown or something, right?
Today's episode is called "Welcome to the Tombs" - that seems like a pretty bad ass place for a battle, no?

pink floyd is always cool.


There's plenty in the air, and plenty (or so they want you to believe) at stake in tonight's episode.

Will Andrea make it out of Woodbury alive?
Will Team Prison remain Team Prison, or instead Team On-The-Road-Again ?
How will Michonne react to the group sort of ousting her?
How will Daryl react to the death of Merle?
Does Rick have his stuff together enough to keep this gang together?

Is this episode going to provide more closure than questions?

Hit the jump with us, and we'll talk a bit about how we got here.

it's hard to keep stuff like this straight.




8:00 - seriously, do you remember how we got here?

at the end of last season, after being big time dickheads, and very poor house guests, Gang Grimes inadvertantly drew a horde to Hershel's farm. In the process, people were killed, the group dispersed and confusion ensued. Everybody hit the road, with Shane dead, Andrea on her own and the rest of the Group without a home.

Rick declared a dictatorship, and some Prison loomed in the background - oh, then we met Michonne!

Fast forward to this season. 
It starts off with Michonne and Andrea on their own in the woods and Gang Grimes installing themselves in the Prison. Along the way, the group loses T-Dog (but not Carol, as they thought.) Michonne and Andrea find Woodbury, and consequently the Governor - oh! and Merle's there!

The rest of the season shakes back and forth in pretty weird fashion.
The Governor turns out to be an obvious creep.
Carl ends up having to murder his kill his mother to deliver his baby sister.
Rick ends up slowly going crazy seeing ghosts and having imaginary conversations.

poor crazy bastard.

So after some stupid shenanigans, Maggie and Glen are abducted by Merle (while looking for supplies for Judith), and the beef between Woodbury and the Prison is started. On the way, Michonne switches sides, kills the Governors walker-daughter, and because a general bargaining chip throughout the season. Andrea stays with the Gov and does stupid, stupid stuff for another season because the writers hate her. She's eventually held captive in a torture room... ummm, Glen and Maggie sort of get married. Rick starts going super crazy but on a trip to find weapons meets his old buddy Morgan and regains some sanity (while making friends with Michonne a little bit)


Later, Rick and company attack the Woodbury camp. This of course later leads to retaliation, and then the first meeting of the United Nations of ButtFuck Georgia. During said meeting, the Michonne Treaty is struck. Governor says that if Rick turns over Michonne, the Prison will be spared. Rick is - well, isn't - an idiot, and this decision takes way too long. Merle (who for a cup of tea switched over to the prison side) kidnaps Michonne, intending to turn her over to the Gov. He's is however given his bullshit villian face turn retribution as he ends up letting her free and taking out a small portion of the Woodbury crew all on his own before getting killed by the Gov and turning into a walker that's later killed by Daryl. That bit was sort of rough.

it was 'walking dixons' all over again.

all of this leads up to what promises to be a powerful showdown tonight.

it's been an eventful season, to put it lightly.
They've introduced some pretty interesting characters in the Governor and Michonne.
They've killed off some characters they've had difficulties writing well in Lori and T-Dog.
Rick has gone crazy rather believably, and that's a nice touch.
Carl is developing into a rather strong and nuanced character... ha - okay. Well, he doesn't talk a lot, and seems to have feelings, I guess. Hey, he shoots way better now.

like mother like son.



Either way, some people and a lot of walkers are going to die tonight. Let's enjoy it!

8:15 - Make sure you pop some beers in the fridge, and get 'em out before this one gets started. It's sure to be something fierce, and you'll need a little something to take the edge off! Tonight we're having some Heineken and some James Ready 5.5

8:30 - Programming note:

Do you like Game of Thrones?
Yeah, us too.
So much so, we're going to liveblog it!
Pretty crazy, no?
We'll be doing a liveblog on a delay immediately after this finale.
Come check it out!

8:45 - oh boy, oh boy, oh boy... it's close now.
who's expecting to be disappointed?
who's expecting lots of deaths?
who's expecting some stupid cliffhanger or some such thing that leads into next season?

drink if you fit into any of those categories.

ladeeda. fancy pints.

8:50 - in its way, it's sort of sad this season is coming to an end.
in another way, it's not so bad at all.

either way, pretty excited for this finale!

8:55 - five minute warning! turn down the lights and close up the shutters!

9:00 - wow, tuned in early and saw Merle got smashed upon again. He was a walker and whatnot, but that was rough.  
So, previously. We're reminded that the Gov is a piece of Junk, and Rick is set up as the inverse.

9:00 - we open on a crazy zoom on the Gov's good eye.
He's punching someone who is obviously Andrea.
He really looks like he's moving a camera, not a face.

Oooh, he's not hitting Andrea, it's Milton.
He's pissed about those walkers getting burned up.
Pins the death of all those men Merle killed on Milton for that.

"And you knew those men.  They kept you safe. They kept you fed."

"As long as I looked the other way" Milton tells him.

"Time for you to graduate," Gov retaliates.

9:02 - Milton's crying.

Governor tells him a secret: he enjoys this.

"the smell of gun powder and the sight of blood. you know what that means? you're alive."

Gov goes on being creepy, with really stylized crappy blood splotches on his face.

"What would your daughter think? About what you are?"

Governor gets in his face.

"She'd be afraid of me. But if I was like this when this began she'd still be alive."

fuck OFF, you abusive psychopath.  i will be so glad when you are over.

9:03 - Governor throws Milton into Andrea's room.

Andrea tells him they don't have to go to war. That it'll be okay.

"Your friends at the Prison. I want to kill them."

He goes on that he lied to all the people to get them worked up about the Prison so they will kill Rick&co.

9:04 - Gov tells Milton to gather up his tools.
A stupid scene unfolds where Milton drops a bunch of stuff, plays around and maybe stashes a weapon.

Governor tells him to leave, but then grabs him and thrusts a knife in his face.

"You're going to kill her now..."

"...there is no way you're going to leave this room without doing it. Don't make it hard. Just do it."

Milton staggers up to Andrea, then turns around and tries to stab the Gov.

Gov blocks it and brutally knifes the guts out of Milton.

"I told you you're going to do it. And you're going to do it. You're going to turn... and then you'll tear the flesh from her bones."

Governor leaves with some crazy kill or die line, thinking Walker Milton will take out Andrea, but he should know better. If a warehouse of walkers didn't kill him two days ago, how's one going to kill Andrea?  But seriously, it's a terrible line.  "You kill or you die.  Or, you die and you kill."  SO CLEVARRRRR.  why are these writers so obsessed with ham-handed parallels?

opening credit time!

oh, also - Milton is dead. Drink pre-emptively.

...so, crappy dialogue and poor makeup? weird start to this one. hopefully it picks up.

steven from ohio is your number one walking dead fan apparently...

and apparently i give a fuck?

no.

and not a single rose was thrown that day.

9:10 - whelp, we're back at the Prison in the morning.
Melissa McBride shouldn't be al also starring.

So Carl's in his cell packing up memories; pictures, a badge, presumably for Judith during some nice, yet sappy piano music. Hershel's packing too, in the background.

Carl's bag is epically huge. He puts on his Sheriff's hat for levity and goes outside.
These proportions aren't doing you any favours, little buddy.

Rick tries to talk to Carl, but he blows by and doesn't even say anything.
Poor Carl.  And also, poor us having to deal with all this heavy-handed symbolism.  The picture Michonne rescued, thus proving her worth!  His dad's badge - does he really deserve it anymore?

(link)

Glen approaches Rick.

"I've never seen him this mad. Even with Lori, he just shut down."

"He's still a kid," Rick replies. "It's easy forget."

Rick goes to get in a car, but gets distracted by ghost Lori, one last time.

9:12 - Daryl and Carol talk about Merle briefly, and how he gave them a chance.

Inside now apparently?, Rick stalks about and meets Michonne.

"We're ready," she tells him.

"The deal the Governor offered about me? You had to think about it. You had to. I get it"

Rick says apologizes and says they came real close.

"But you didn't" Michonne says.

They walk and they Michonne says that she never thanked him.

"What?" Rick drawls.

For taking her in that day, when she came to the fence.
Rick says it was the baby formula, but she knows it wasn't.
Rick goes on to say that it was Carl that made the call.

Carl runs all this shit, doesn't he?
I don't really understand Michonne's motivation here.  Also, did rick just look at her boobs?

9:14 - Well, over at Woodbury, the Governor is all psyched up, talking like a wrestler, talking about "ending this once and for all".

(link)


HOLY SHIT!

Tyrese says they won't go fight the prison.

"We'll stay here and defend the children."  He acknowledges that when the Governor et al return, it will be their call whether he and Sasha stay or are exiled.

Governor grows silent, but then gives Tyrese a gun and says "Thank You" all steely like.

"Let's roll" he says.

Yeah.  That gun?
Definitely one of these:

(link)


9:15 - wow!

The Woodbury guys roll up on the Prison guns-blazing, automatic gatling guns killing walkers, and taking down fences, and missiles taking out the guard stands? Absolute chaos! Drink.

9:17 - All the Biters dispelled (lots of drinks there.), they exit the trucks and fan out amidst some pulsing awesome Bear Mcreary shit. Where'd they get all this ammo?

The Prison seems fairly deserted though.

Woodburians press on though, using trucks to tear down the fences to Cell-Block C.

White Dude from Tyrese's group opens up the gates to the Prison and in they go.

It's deserted.

Man, this music is great.

The men inspect the eery prison interior, the Governor walking about quietly and rather menacingly.
They're being pretty silent about the whole thing.

Gang Grimes is gone, aren't they?

Martinez comes out and shakes his head.

Gov is pissed.

9:19 - Governor stops passing a cell.

Something caught his attention.

Hershel's bible.

A passage is highlighted. It's a bible, I'm not trying to read it.
Governor gets pissed and tosses it down. 

Ugh, fine. Don't ever say we're not nice.

blah blah walking dead bible passage blah blah psalmthing


Must have been a message.  I would have gone with something like this.

Governor decides the groups should spread out.

Greeeeeaaat idea.

Walkers are heard in the background.

9:20 - Back with Andrea and Milton.

He's alive, barely.

"When the tools dropped," he sputteres "I left some pliers on the floor. If you can drag your right foot back you can get them."

Nice. A stupid struggle scene.  It's nice that Milton was there to direct her, otherwise she probably would have sat and stared until he chewed her eyes out.
This is very Gerald's Game.  

Andrea says they're going to get out of here, and he'll be okay.

"When you get free, you are going to find something very sharp, and you are going to stab me in the head. That is what you are going to do. Keep trying."

Nice acting by this guy.  The lack of contractions is a good touch.  But yeah, intense scene to go to commercial on.
Commercial!  Drink!

9:25 - we're back, and the Governor is winding his way through the catacombs.
They hear something.
A door closing.

"This way," he barks.

9:26 - Back at Woodbury, Tyrese and Sasha discuss the issues at hand. 

"What do you think happens when they return?"

"Might have to slip out, Andrea did it."

yeah, about that.

Tyrese leaves, although it's Sasha's shift.

9:26 - Andrea's got her pliers, maybe... But Milton isn't talking or moving anymore.

Oh no, little noises escaping his throat.

Oh, shit. He's back conscious.

He asks her why she stayed.

"I wanted to save everyone. Even the Governor. I had a chance to kill him."

"I stopped you." Milton says.

she explains it was a different situation, and she did it because she "didn't want anyone to die."

Andrea smiles (makeup looking better now)
and Milton says "I'm still here. I'm still alive."

They have a sweet moment, but then he tells her she needs to hurry.

no SHIT!  she wasn't even trying to do anything while they were talking.  if there ever was a time for multitasking, this is probably it.

She takes her boots off and gets to hurrying.

9:29 - The Governor's people are heading through a section of the tombs and gas bombs and flashes start going off. Booby traps! This attracts a bunch of biters.

They run outside and are ambushed by GLEN! Glen opens fire and shit breaks out.

Carl's hiding in the woods.

The Woodburians get back to their killing truck.

Glen keeps firing from his foothold, and it seems as though the Woodburians have retreated.

Glen (and Maggie who was apparently there, posted across from him in relatively identical tactical gear) have/has a moment of jubilation.

Dammit, they're so cute.

9:31 - Hershel and Carl (and Beth) come upon one of the Woodburians fleeing through the woods.

Carl stops him, and has him squarely in his sights. (with that massive fuckin silencer.)

Woodbury boy, looking a lot like Pete Wentz, is offering his weapon in a tense standoff, but Carl pops him anyway.

Hershel is horrified. Carl is hard.  or...horrible?  I mean, OMG Carl.  You're killing people to make a point to your dad?!
Zombie-Apocalypse teenage rebellions are the worst!

commercials.

Drink

why the hell did woodbury retreat when they had that kind of firepower?

9:35 - back at the Prison, the group is discussing what to do now.

Will the Woodbury folk come back? Should they go after them?

Inside it turns out Judith and Beth are okay.
Interesting. Judith's actually in this one.

"Dad, I'm coming to Woodbury," Carl tells Rick. "I took out one of the Governor's soldiers."

Hershel says the soldier was just a kid.

Rick says he was sorry he had to do that. Carl wasn't sorry.

Then Rick and Hershel have a conversation about self-defense in which Hershel raises his voice.

"I'm telling you. He gunned that kid down."

Good acting.


9:37 - Holy shit. Division in the ranks with the Gov?

He pulls over the truck that took off. His people are freaking out and saying he won't go back.
The Governor goes crazy (you can tell by the ringing sound effects, and the fact that i start saying "no no no no no" as the tension builds)
and kills nearly all the would-be deserters.

Martinez and Whitey back up.

Whitey draws his gun. The Governor stares at him coldly and shoots him point blank.

Martinez looks on, frightened, as the Govgeoes out into the field and starts putting bullets into heads.
He comes upon a woman (Karen?) hiding under the dead body of a man - luckily the governor is out of bullets (although I do seem to recall Carol using Axel as a pretty effective human shield earlier this season!).

The Governor is left with two soldiers, who look on, befuddled and obviously concerned. They eventually just get in the truck and drive off.  I mean, there are two of them, though?  Maybe they could overpower him while he's driving?

Holy shit.
That was crazy.

9:40 - back in her cell, Andrea awkwardly tries to pick pliers up with her feet while maybe talking to a dead guy?

she's super beat up.

Time to play a game of picksies-dropsies.

Man, Milton sure is hardy, hanging on this long.

Oop! She almost has them now!

Suspense, yay.

Seems Milton is dead.
Stupid freshly-turned Walkers all strong and not decayed.  How long has it been since Andrea's seen one of those?

We head to commercial with her fumbling with handcuffs as Milton's hand begins to twitch.

9:46 - we return to Daryl revving up his bike at the front of the Prison.

Rick goes to talk to Carl.

"Hershel told me about the boy you shot."

"He had a gun."

Rick hmms. Good idea.

"Was he handing it over?"

"They were just attacking us."

Rick repeats his question.

"I couldn't kill the walker that killed Dale. I couldn't take the chance. You didn't kill Andrew who came back and killed mom. You were in a room with the Governor, and you didn't kill him.  And then he killed Merle."

wow, Carl walks off and drops Rick's badge.
okay. Snotty prick. I'm the sheriff now, DAD.

Carl seems to forget the past, and him kinda killing Lori?  And that she basically died in childbirth?

Anyway, Rick and Co., go off, but Daryl, Carol, Glen and Beth stay back? Maybe Maggie too.
Beth gets a kill, but still no talking.

9:49 - Grimes and Co., come up on the Governor's kill scene where the few that haven't turned are feeding on the others. 

Pretty sick.

Gang Grimes cleans up the scene, and meets the woman in the truck. 
She's pulled out at gunpoint.

9:49 - back with Andrea - HURRY THE FUCK UP!!

So she's still not got it, even though she's had a whole commercial break, and Milton is turning.

He's to his feet, but she's got one hand out.

Her panic and fear sweat will surely help.

They cut to outside of the room and a bunch of swinging light and yelling occurs to make us wonder what happened. WTF?  these writers and their hackneyed suspense.

Commercialz.

OH NO!
Daryl's on Talking Dead.  
He's okay, right?

9:56 - oh shit. Rick and his small group are at the walls of Woodbury and shots are being exchanged.
Karen, which is apparently the woman's name, is now calling out to Tyrese and explaining what's happening.

Shots are held.

"Why are you with them," Tyrese asks

"They," she pauses "saved me."

9:57 - "we're coming out," rick half-shrieks.
he repeats himself, in a deeper more assertive voice, then comes out without his weapons.  Daryl is a regular disgruntled goat, but he follows suit.

(link)


Tyrese asks what they're doing here.

"We were coming to finish things... 'til we saw what the governor did."

Welp, they start asking about Andrea and then go looking.

9:58 - they come upon that door, all their weapons drawn.

Walker Milton is dead on the floor and Andrea is off to the side.
Shit!

"You're burning up," Michonne says.

She's been bitten!

Andrea asks about Judith and Carl, the rest of "them."

Rick says "the rest of us," and grabs her hand, and it's pretty sweet.

"It's good you found them," she tells Michonne

and there's a super cute goodbye scene with everybody smiling at her.

"I just didn't want anyone to die," she says.

"I can do it myself," she says.

Michonne tries to stop her.

"oooh, I have to. While I still can."

Great! Finally Andrea gets to kill herself! 
Remember how much she wanted to do that in season one?  And then you guys wouldn't let her?
Slow claps.  All around.

"Please," she asks Rick. "I know how the safety works."

aww, super cute throwback.  very sad.

Michonne says she's "not going anywhere." so I guess they're all going to stay and watch?

oookay.

Note: It is super hard to watch Danai Gurira cry.  It's not quite at Norman Reedus levels, but it's by far the most emotionally vulnerable we've ever seen her, and she seems so gutted at having let down her friend.  And i LOVE that she wants to stay with Andrea and bear witness to what happens - it's so fitting with her character and so honouring of their relationship (not that we got to see much of that).

"I tried," Andrea says.

"Yeah, you did." Rick tells her.

Daryl and Rick leave Michonne and Andrea to themselves.
They share one last look.

Andrea gets bit
okay, new OTP, Andrea and Michonne 'til the end
(link)


We cut to Daryl and Tyrese and Daryl outside of the room.

The gunshot rings out, and the screen goes black.

10:02 - we head back to the Prison, and my Game of Thrones  blog is starting even later.

There's a sunsoaked reunion scene, and everybody at camp Prison is confused, because apparently Rick has gone ahead and rescued all the children and adults who were left behind at Woodbury.

"What is this," Carl protests.

"They're going to join us," Rick tells him.

Well, that's an interesting turn.

Things get really sweet as a bunch of people move into the Prison.
Everybody looks on, shocked by Rick's turn.

Rick though? He's just busy looking around at stuff and thangs.
We end the seasons on some shots of walkers in the field and Lori's grave, which was coincidentally the first shot of the prison in this episode.

Not bad.  But almost cloyingly hopeful?
Everything bathed in sunlight, an influx of innocents, mellow guitar music, and no trace of the show's theme song?
hmm.

We'll give a synopsis in a bit!

Overall, I suppose we received more closure than I was expecting.  While Woodbury itself is no longer a threat, a rabid Governor (along with two minions who should tooootally kill him!) is driving around, poised to become a menace all over again.  However, how much threat can one man really pose?  As the first scene demonstrated, the Joker he ain't.

(link)
We lost Andrea, Milton, and many Woodburians.  And even more over the course of the season!  I expect you'll want some kind of run-down here, but I'm not a fucking magician.  Use Google!

*ahem*
Anyway!  So some episodes of this season were pretty cool!  
But overall, I'd say this season sucked.  I can't help but hold everything to a standard of potential set by the first season, if not basic theories of storytelling - and it nearly always comes up wanting.
That said, compared to last season?

(link)

Join us back here this fall (or y'know keep checking back in the interim) for all your Walking Dead fun. In the mean time, stay safe, and keep starting off into the distance at y'know, stuff, and thangs.

that'll do Rick. that'll do.
(link)

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Posted in 31-March-13, adaptation, horror, racism, recap, sexual violence, sort-of-a-movie, stuff and thangs, the walking dead liveblog, the walking dead season three, welcome to the tombs, women characters | No comments

Thursday, 28 March 2013

The Wall Street Journal on The Believer

Posted on 17:51 by Unknown


Celebrating a Decade of the Believer 


by David Shapiro

"I'm going to read about half of a 20-page science-fiction poem about different eras, unhinged nostalgia and the ways that capitalism impacts our relationships to our bodies and to each other," said Joanna Fuhrman, sitting in a chair in the back of Greenlight Bookstore in Fort Greene on Monday evening.

Ms. Fuhrman, a poet and professor of poetry at Rutgers University, was one of three writers reading at the Greenlight to celebrate the 10th anniversary of the Believer, the San Francisco-based literary magazine published by McSweeney's, and a new book of interviews published by the magazine.
A sign outside the store promised "mingling to follow," and, indeed, the primarily 20- and 30-something crowd of Brooklyn literary types mingled with Believer editors. Guests sipped beer provided by Brooklyn Brewery and nibbled exotic treats donated by Spirited Brooklyn. Dustin Kurtz, marketing manager at independent publisher Melville House, walked up to the treats and said, "Wow!" to himself, before grabbing a small cup of spiced bacon beer nuts and a beer-infused mal-o'more.
"The Believer's staff is all over the country, and we communicate primarily via email, so events like this are great because you get to spend time with the community around the magazine and really see email come alive," said Mr. Leland, while mingling.One of the magazine's editors, Andrew Leland, introduced the reading with a nod to a potential calendar conflict: "The Believer is an Orthodox Jewish magazine, so thank you all for making it here on the first night of Passover!" he joked. (The Believer is religiously unaffiliated.)

Poet Alan Gilbert brought up another potential calendar conflict, interrupting himself during his own poem to ask the crowd about the relationship between the phrase "midnight madness," used in his poem, and the nickname of the NCAA basketball tournament, March Madness. He was met with silence, which prompted him to look around the room and observe, "This isn't a sports-oriented crowd…"
The evening's star was author and University of Pittsburgh professor Gary Lutz, whose live interview with Believer editor Ross Simonini had the otherwise reserved listeners in stitches. Mr. Lutz expounded on his lifelong aversion to oral contact (and, later, on his fondness for divorce).

"I didn't have my first conversation until I was in graduate school," said Mr. Lutz, whose self-consciousness and half-joking self-deprecation made Woody Allen seem like Albert Brooks. "I was a late bloomer."
"When I'm writing, I can spend hours on a single sentence," he continued. "But in person, people tend to think of me as mute, or mentally deficient, or someone to be avoided as a person who does not have much to contribute to a conversation. People don't like hourlong pauses between thoughts," Mr. Lutz mused earnestly, avoiding eye contact.

Ross Simonini, who interviewed Mr. Lutz at the event, had conducted an email interview with Mr. Lutz throughout the summer of 2006 but had only met him in person five minutes before their interview. "He was exactly what I expected him to be in person, based on our emails and secondhand encounters through friends," said Mr. Simonini, smiling and refusing to elaborate.
In the back of the bookstore prior to his interview, Mr. Lutz discussed some recent and disappointing trends in punctuation and grammar, a subject about which he is writing a book.
"A lot of publications would publish a sentence like this: 'The suspect was arrested at his apartment in Prospect Heights.' But without a comma after 'apartment,' the sentence signifies that the suspect has at least two apartments. Conversely, for example, you might read a sentence like this: 'Malcolm Gladwell's book, 'The Tipping Point,' introduced a term that is now in wide currency.' A reader unfamiliar with Gladwell would assume that he had published only one book!
"These errors appear with frequency in the Goings On About Town section of the New Yorker. They also happen a lot in music writing," he went on. "The sentence 'Radiohead is touring to promote their new album' contains a logical and grammatical breakdown regarding whether the band is singular or plural. The phrase 'The band's 1993 debut album' is also confusing to the careful reader, because a band could not have had a 1993 debut album, and also, for example, a 1994 debut album."
"I understand that writers are trying to fit many ideas into short sentences, but these breakdowns are very distracting," he added, shifting in his chair with frustration.
Read it at the WSJ
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